In our digital age, connecting with others has never been easier. The online space offers endless opportunities for interaction and intimate communication. But despite these possibilities, setting healthy boundaries with others can become really confusing as to how to create the space your body needs to feel safe when communicating with others.

Oh, the anxious-avoidant dance. This relationship often seems doomed to fail, but that isn’t always the case (although, sometimes, it is, and that’s okay too). While we know that no relationship is perfect (because no one is perfect), the anxious-avoidant partnership is a little more complicated.

Have you ever found yourself in a situation where you felt misunderstood or like your partner was projecting or pushing their own feelings onto you? Projection in relationships can be a common source of conflict and can lead to misunderstandings, hurt feelings, and bring an end to relationships.

Do you wish you had a crystal ball sometimes? I can’t be the only one who has felt this way. When you’re going through a hard season of life or trying to make an important decision, it’s normal to wish that you could see the future. It’s a natural way to cope with the unknown.

Have you recently thought or maybe even said, “I don’t want to be an adult anymore.” Or maybe you’re regularly feeling alone, suffocated, or not enough. Adults all have one thing in common. We are all carrying around the attachment patterns, belief systems, and core wounds from our childhoods.

Our culture likes us to be problem solvers and fixers. When we see something wrong on the outside, we rush to find a solution for it. Maybe you don’t like the way you look, so you go on a diet. Or you might be unhappy with your relationship, so you automatically think that you didn’t find “the one.”

Boundaries—a word used often and means various things to so many people. At first glance, I find that many tend to think of boundaries as saying “No.” In our culture of “Yes” and doing more, many have built up the courage to say “No” after years of overextending and people-pleasing.

It’s the month of celebrations with all of the different holidays that are awaiting us. Even the songs on the radio tell us that it’s “the most wonderful time of the year!” However, for many people, the holiday season can bring on anxiety and depression. Why? For a newly single person, it can mean days spent answering unwanted questions

Have you ever found a romantic partner who you felt completely connected with only to find out months (or even years) later that they’re not at all who they once appeared to be? In fact, they might have turned out to be quite the opposite of who you originally fell in love with

When a meaningful relationship ends, we say our heart is broken. When someone we love deceives us, we say we’ve been stabbed in the back. That’s because rejection of any kind, especially from someone we care for, is a painful experience.

Of course, when our partner leaves us, they aren’t physically breaking our heart in half… And when our friend lies to us, they aren’t actually plunging a knife into our backs (let’s hope).

Humans have a biological need for community, support, and connection… And that starts from birth. We form these healthy attachments based on the ability to trust that our needs will be tended to. The more we can depend and trust as a youngster, the more we actually learn how to be interdependent and secure as an adult.

For many, the last two-plus years have felt like trying to navigate through a nightmare, or some version of the Twilight Zone, where all of their deepest insecurities were glaringly impossible to run from. Throughout the pandemic, just about everyone has gone through one experience or another that felt like the ground was pulled out from underneath them.

One steps forward, the other steps back. One explodes outward, leaving everything on the table, the other shuts down and pulls everything inward. These are the makings of what I call the anxious-avoidant dance.
As adults, we all have what’s called an attachment style. While different people may bring out different sides of us, we tend to be either anxious, avoidant, or secure.

When we enter a relationship, there’s an energetic dance that begins. Whether it’s our different attachment styles, triggers, or beliefs, there’s a merging of two energetic entities at play.

When we share a space with someone, it makes sense that our beings intertwine more than just physically.

As humans, since the day of our birth, we are wired for connection.
As children, we rely on our caregivers for this connection. If our parents aren’t able to give us the love, affection, or means we need to feel safe in this world, we will adapt by choosing other ways of behaving to hopefully receive the feeling of connection we need.

As humans, we are all born with the potential to love everything and everyone equally and unconditionally. Ideally, we are also able to trust that everyone loves us in the same way. But, of course, life experience teaches us that this is not necessarily the case.

Let me start off with an unpopular opinion: It’s time to try something other than a New Year’s resolution. Perhaps we abandon this ideology altogether (I warned you it would be unpopular). Before you tune me out, just hear me out…

“Human being” is all about being present. When you’re hungry, eat. When you’re tired, sleep. Or when you’re with your partner, be with them fully.

While it may be easy to talk about, “human being” is no easy task… From our careers to our social lives, we humans have done a very good job of becoming busy bodies.

Think of your relationship as a dance... Whether it’s the flow of give and take, leaning on and being leaned on, or navigating through troubled times, no relationship stays the same forever or is without its bumps and changes. So, when we approach topics like codependency, it’s important to note that no relationship is conflict-free. But, there is a difference between a normal relationship speed bump and a red flag.

They give you the silent treatment for days without any reason why, then show up unannounced at your door with flowers. They berate you with insults and meanness, only to end the conversation with a sudden moment of kindness. While this may sound like the chemistry-ridden ebb and flow of an exciting relationship, it’s not… It’s actually what leads to “trauma bonding.”